Thursday, January 11, 2007

G.I. Jon and Nightcrawler Part 4: The Atoll of Fear

Previously on G.I. Joe, the Joe team’s efforts to save the nuclear scientists were thwarted when Cobra Commander launched the scientists to the four corners of the globe. Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator accompanied Flint’s team to rescue Dr. Brown at the arctic circle while Nightcrawler joined Beach Head’s team in Jungle of Doom to liberate Dr. White. Meanwhile, Doc and Lifeline race against time to save Duke, who slipped into a coma while Cobra Commander plans his ultimate scheme. Can the Joes rescue the other two scientists and foil Cobras plans once and for all? Stay tuned and find out!

*** On Board the USS Flagg aircraft carrier ***

After the successful mission at the North Pole, I was quickly flown to the Flagg in a Skystriker. There I met the team standing by to rescue the third scientist.

“Lieutenant Falcon, good to see you again.” I shook the Special Forces officer’s hand. “How are things going?”

“Doing well, Jon,” he answered. “Let me introduce you to the team, this is Sgt. Slaughter, Shipwreck, Cutter, Bazooka, Jinx, and Alpine.”

“You better be ready to bust some heads,” Sgt. Slaughter growled. “I don’t have time to babysit your sorry hide.”

“Don’t worry about me, Sarge,” I grinned. “I can take care of myself.”

“Yeah well if you can’t hang, yer going home in a ditty bag.” The Marine drill instructor leaned in close to me. “An itty bitty ditty bag.”

“I’m ready to go when everyone else is,” I said after greeting everyone.

We loaded up in the WHALE and headed out, making our way across the waves towards the Atoll of Fear.

“Sea’s kind of choppy, huh?” I called out from the starboard twin .50 cal turret.

“Yeah, looks like you don’t have yer sea legs yet, ya lubber,” Shipwreck laughed. “Hope you get ‘em before we hit the beach.”

“OK, so if this is a sea op,” I shouted above the bellow of the giant propellers and noise of the waves. “What’s with these two?”

“We’re comic relief,” rumbled Bazooka.

“Yeah, we’re a team,” Added Alpine. “Like Abbot and Costello, Laurel and Hardy.”

“Tommy and Richard,” Bazooka offered.

“Tommy and Richard?” I said.

“Don’t ask,” Alpine answered.

We hit the beach with Cobra firing at us from their stronghold. Laser fire whizzed past as the terrorists shouted their battle cry. Bazooka dove to the ground with a loud “Oof” and fired a rocket across the beach.

“I’m gonna break some snakes!” Sgt. Slaughter ran over to and pulled on an outcropping of rock with all his might. A loose column tore free and collapsed onto the STUNs. Cobra troops leaped out of the vehicles as they exploded.

“More Cobras, over there!” Falcon pointed towards some more ground troops.

“Leave them to me.” Jinx tore into hapless terrorists like a whirlwind. They didn’t stand a chance against her ninja skills and were soon running away.

“Looks like the snakes are turning tail,” Cutter pointed towards the retreating enemy.

“Looks like they were just setting us up to hit us from above!” I pointed to where Cobra Rattlers were taking off from hidden hanger. They roared into the air and fired down on us from the sky.

“Times up for you, Joes!” Wild Weasel led the air attack. “Cobra!”

“We’re gonna need some help or else our goose is cooked!” Alpine dove for cover.

“Gooses?” Bazooka asked as he too dove for cover.

“Either way,” Falcon said. “We’re in trouble.”

*** Meanwhile at G.I. Joe Headquarters ***

“Duke’s condition is stabilizing,” Lifeline said while reading the monitors.

“It looks like he’s going to pull through,” Doc agreed. “He’s starting to come to!”

Duke rustled slightly, but then the equipment rang an alarm.

“He’s slipping back!” Lifeline wailed. “As you know, I’m a pacifist and would never touch a weapon, even to save my own life. But sometimes I get so gosh-darned angry I want to grab a gun and just shoot all those Cobra vehicles myself!”

“Whoa whoa, calm down, buddy,” Doc said. “If only we could just get into his head.”

*** Meanwhile at the Atoll of Fear ***

“We’re in trouble, Falcon,” Jinx said. “We need help and fast.”

“Ask and you shall receive,” the lieutenant pointed. “Look.”

From above, Skystrikers and Conquest X-30’s quickly took control of the skies.

“Hit ‘em where it hurts, Joes,” General Hawk radioed from the cockpit of his Conquest. “Right in their beady little eyes!”

Many Rattlers exploded; the remaining flew off towards the setting sun to escape. The Joes on the beach jumped up and down and cheered at the turn of events.

“Look what I found.” Cutter strolled up, escorting one nuclear scientist. “Everybody meet Dr. Blonde.”

“Dr. Blonde, I’m Lieutenant Falcon. We’re here to take you home.”

“Oh, thank goodness,” the physicist sighed. “Get me out of here.”

“Hope you brought your sea legs,” Shipwreck cracked.

*** Meanwhile at the Terrordrome ***

“Three rescue attempts, three rescued nuclear scientists, my dear Cobra Commander,” Destro announced. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think your plan was failing.”

“Patienccccce, Destro,” Cobra Commander replied. “The ssssuper weapon is almost finished. And when it is, G.I. Joe will be finished too! Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha!”



Blogger Local Henchmen 432 said...

Jon,you send these posts to Devils Due. Maybe you could write a Joe series.

12:38 PM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said...

Yeah! Another conflict resolved with only violence towards machinery. You and the Joes hit ‘em where it hurts - The Pocketbook. Those COBRAs are going to have the highest auto insurance rate ever seen.

YO JOE!!!! (dang it, I can't seem to stop)

1:33 PM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

"I'm sorry, Mr. Commander, but your rates are going up again this year. It appears that all of your vehicles covered in our plan keep exploding."

"Cursssse those G.I. Joesssss!"

And thank you Henchy.

1:36 PM  
Blogger Mr. Bennet said...

You may find yourself in trouble in the next episode. If Cobra uses Henchman's plan for world domination, they'll start shooting you and the Joes!

3:24 PM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said...

You can tell Jon is a gooder writer than some of us, cuz he uses words like Atoll intsted of island.

No really you are a gooder writer than me.

4:29 PM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Yeah, but if it were still December, I would've used isthmus, cuz I'm dreaming of a white isthmus.

4:42 PM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Yeah, but if it were still December, I would've used isthmus, cuz I'm dreaming of a white isthmus.

4:42 PM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Yeah, but if it were still December, I would've used isthmus, cuz I'm dreaming of a white isthmus.

4:42 PM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Stop this crazy thing, Jane! I want to get off!

4:43 PM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Stop this crazy thing, Jane! I want to get off!

4:43 PM  
Blogger captain koma said...


What another post from Team Boring.


6:35 PM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said...

Koma is all wrong. Jon and Nightcrawler are not Team Boring. They are Team Action Packed Saturday morning fun!!

6:40 PM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

That's right, Tak, so grab a big whomping bowl of your sugariest sugar-coated cereal, sit down and enjoy the ride.

Oh and Koma, Look behind you, I think someone's waiting to use that library computer that you're on.

6:59 PM  
Blogger Professor Xavier said...

I thought GI Joe was a weekday afternoon program.

7:02 PM  
Blogger captain koma said...

Hey while you losers were watching Grossly Incompitant Joeseph. I was watching music video's. And good ones like David Bowies Ashes to Ashes and not that R&B shake your arse crap that all have the same drum machine.

Also Grossly Incompitent Joeseph is financed by the US Army. Its propaganda. My 1980's Japanese cartoons taught me the US is bad.


10:04 PM  
Blogger Local Henchmen 432 said...

Oh man Koma, You are going to reap the whirlwind.

11:28 PM  
Blogger Randy said...

Yo dog, I knew that form the opening Salvo that you would kick those Cobras right in the Ace. Keep it strong, dog.

6:54 AM  
Blogger Professor Xavier said...

This is a family friendly blog Randy, despite all the wanton destruction. I don't think you can say words like Ace.

8:12 AM  
Blogger Randy said...

Sorry dog, my bad.

Please don't let the censors Barbeque me over this.

11:54 AM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said...

Psst Prof X, why does Randy get all word bold on us.

3:03 PM  
Blogger Paula Abdrool said...

This is the most exciting adventure I have ever read! You go boy!!

4:11 PM  
Blogger Simon said...

oh dear god, my attention span can't take much more

4:12 PM  

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